HOLY TRINITY: BINGE, PURGE, REPEAT

Here's spiritual food for thought.

There's a faith-based diet program out there that has some people singing its praises while others are not so quick to convert.


It seems the Weigh Down Workshop, designed by nutritionist Gwen Shamblin, looks to lessons in the Bible to help over-eaters conquer their food-to-mouth addictions and slim down.

Some former fatties claim it's a miracle, and some say it's nothing more than a legalistic cult that starves and guilts faithful followers into thinking they will lose their salvation if they eat one bite more than God allows.


With obesity running rampant (OK not running, but walking slowly), who cares how someone loses weight. The Bible, as compared to other religious doctrines, might just have the skinny on helping those believers who can't stop stuffing their pie-holes.

I mean, look how fat Buddha is.

On second thought, realization = salvation:


("The Eye of God" photo was taken by NASA Hubble Space Telescope)

REAL MEN (& WOMEN) OF GENIUS

Just how light is "light" beer?

A new rule has been proposed that would require nutritional information be put on all alcoholic drink packaging, including alcoholic content, number of calories, carbohydrates, fat and protein for a standard serving size.


Currently, labels on liquor and wine with more than 14 percent alcohol must disclose at least the alcohol content, but it is not required on beer labels in most states.

Under the new proposal, if a brewer wants its beer to be labeled as light, it must show the caloric and alcohol content.

But don't fret.


It may be some time before companies are forced to comply with the proposed regulation since the Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau first must gather comments on the proposed rule and then review them. It could take up to three years before the rule is official.

In the meantime beer bellies, chugalug without guilt.

TOOTSIE'S ROLLS

West Hollywood, Calif., wants to ban cosmetic surgery.


Not for people ... but pets.

Lawmakers say unnecessary "non-curative" surgeries, such as ear cropping, tail docking and debarking are cruel body alterations for the critters. The animal-friendly town that calls pet owners "pet guardians" already has made cat de-clawing illegal.


I wonder if "non-curative" surgery includes spaying and neutering.

Here's my logic ... Chihuahua Toots got fat after we had her spayed.

In any case, she's pretty fat, so would a little lipo on plus-sized Tootsie's rolls be illegal? Sounds like "curative" surgery to me.


Oh please, I'm just kidding! That little - I mean big - hot tamale keeps my feet warm at night!