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A CYNICAL LOOK AT THE DAILY GRIND

Friday, July 20, 2007

TRANSFORMERS FOR GOD

Wal-Mart is going to start selling faith-based toys.


It's the first time a full line of religious toys (from One2believe) will be offered at a mass market retailer, other than in specialty religious stores.

The world's largest retailer is targeting parents who would rather their kids play with a Samson action figure than Spider Man.

God only knows, there's a lot to be said for a long-haired, super-strength action figure that can kill tons of Philistines, sleep with a prostitute, and fall in love with a traitor before having his eyes gouged out and sent to grind grain.

A Samson toy is sure to bring down the house.



In the long run, religious toys won't be any different than other toys. They all end up in the bottom of a toy box, while some kids prefer to play with everything they're not supposed to play with.

For full story click here

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18 Comments:

Anonymous Pete said...

Coming soon to a WalMarts near you....The Moses Action Figure!
He can part the seas....He can calm the burning bushes....he's so flexible...he can tie his ass to a tree and walk 40 miles through a desert.Comes complete with camels,followers and Manna! Batteries not included.Void where prohibited by law.Taxes are the reponsibility of the winner...Oops,wrong advertisement.

Fri Jul 20, 12:08:00 PM  
Anonymous schweinhundt said...

Oh, come on, now Diana. If there were no Samson we wouldn't have gotten to see Tarzan (Victor Manure) cavorting on the silver screen with the world's most beutiful woman -- Hedy Lamarr.

Fri Jul 20, 01:01:00 PM  
Anonymous Neurotic Christian said...

I already have action figure Jesus. He has wheels on his feet. I love him.

Fri Jul 20, 02:33:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Victor Manure??

Fri Jul 20, 02:34:00 PM  
Anonymous profreader said...

Just in time for the holidays...now your kids, too, can
reeanct the crucifixion in the comfort of their own homes...blood, stakes and loincloth sold separately...

Fri Jul 20, 04:58:00 PM  
Anonymous proofreader said...

GI Jesus...Malibu Moses..Noah's Dream Ark..

Fri Jul 20, 05:00:00 PM  
Anonymous prrofreader said...

wwjd? buy stock in that company of course...

Fri Jul 20, 05:00:00 PM  
Anonymous keep the kids in line said...

Get an Abraham action figure complete with binding straps, knife, angel and sacrificial son!

Fri Jul 20, 05:24:00 PM  
Anonymous proofreader said...

Sodom and Gomorrah Playland? Twister?

Fri Jul 20, 08:55:00 PM  
Anonymous out to lunch said...

i have same jesus that neurotic has.

Sat Jul 21, 12:57:00 PM  
Anonymous neurotic christian said...

I think the actor was Victor Mature, not Victor Manure, though if I'm wrong I can't imagine this guy doing well at the box office with a name like that...

BTW out to lunch, I wish my action figure Jesus came with a kung fu grip or lightning bolts or something...maybe the upgraded version. Action Figure Jesus DS Advance III.

Sat Jul 21, 08:43:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Does he resurrect?

Sat Jul 21, 09:08:00 PM  
Anonymous neurotic christian said...

That would be AWESOME!!

Sun Jul 22, 07:48:00 AM  
Anonymous out to lunch said...

I must resurrect Him from the back of my closet.

Sun Jul 22, 09:23:00 AM  
Anonymous proofreader said...

does Malibu Mary miraculously give birth? ...who da daddy?

Sun Jul 22, 02:33:00 PM  
Anonymous proofreader said...

the Last Supper Easy Bake Oven..oh, it was just recalled..again..

Sun Jul 22, 04:32:00 PM  
Anonymous jesus said...

I'll work on resurrecting it.

Sun Jul 22, 04:39:00 PM  
Anonymous proofreader said...

The company can boast they'll keep the Christ in Christmas...

Sun Jul 22, 11:05:00 PM  

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